Monday, November 26, 2012

Dating other people while in a relationship - Talk About Marriage


General Relationship Discussion Although anyone can post anywhere on Talk About Marriage, this section is for people interested in general relationship and marriage advice.


Old Yesterday, 09:25 AM ? #6 (permalink)

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Is there something wrong with this scenario?
Allow me to translate LiarSpeak for you, Costa.

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He told me he would like to settle down when he is sure that we are truly right for each other
"I would like to settle for you when I am done chasing anyone else who attracts my attention; and when I am sure I can't get anyone hotter than you. You are my Plan B."

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meanwhile I am free to date anyone I like.
"I don't value you enough to want to be exclusive with you, so don't get the wrong idea that you're 'special', because you're not. But I'd still like to fvck you when I can!"

There you go; now that you've removed the forked-tongue, double-speak, it's really quite clear (and quite simple), isn't it?

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Old Yesterday, 03:53 PM ? #13 (permalink)

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If you are looking for a relationship with more substance, keep sex off of the table for a while with the next guy until you are more exclusive.

I can't agree with this point. I've found that sex is one of the important ways a man decides whether a woman is worth being with. Bad sex will equal a quick fade even after they've become exclusive.

Plus, people fall for people who are "into" them. Withholding sex for some arbitrary point is just a way of saying, "I'm not that into you."

As one of the five pillars of compatibility, I would encourage you to do whatever feels natural to you sexually, but remain aware that you are still learning about areas that you are or are not compatible on.

I have to articles on my blog related to this topic that can help you decide how long you should or shouldn't wait:

How Soon Should You Have Sex in a New Relationship?

5 Pillars of Compatibility (& Incompatibility)

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Old Yesterday, 04:03 PM ? #14 (permalink)

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I can't agree with this point. I've found that sex is one of the important ways a man decides whether a woman is worth being with. Bad sex will equal a quick fade even after they've become exclusive.

Plus, people fall for people who are "into" them. Withholding sex for some arbitrary point is just a way of saying, "I'm not that into you."

As one of the five pillars of compatibility, I would encourage you to do whatever feels natural to you sexually, but remain aware that you are still learning about areas that you are or are not compatible on.

I disagree with the above bolded part. I didn't have sex with my husband prior to marriage, not because I wasn't into him, but because of a vow that I made not only to myself, but to my faith. It was hard, and we crossed some lines, but didn't have sex. Now of course this is not true for everyone, but I disagree that it says that you're not into them.

I do think that when sex is not on the table at the beginning you can filter through what a person is like, and if you are compatible in other areas.nsex can cloud emotions for some.

I have not read your articles yet but looking forward to reading them later.

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